Romancing the Bedroom- Marriage On Monday

Better Homes and Gardens


Bedrooms are important. I ask you,  is your bedroom honoring and reflective of your marriage or has it become the dumping ground for all of the left overs and undone projects? {eeek}With this post I am launching the renovation of mine and Doc's bedroom which is in sore need of up-dating!

Bedrooms are highly personal  and the topic is fraught with multiple opinions most of which are held by people with very strong feelings about them.  So with that said I am wading into the deep end as I have chosen to talk about  bedrooms as our personal sanctuaries and havens of our marriages . How we create them and how we make it right for both people who have to sleep there.

Better Homes and Gardens
When it comes to the re-doing of bedrooms there is an amazing amount of martial conflict out there with most of it centered on the feminine~vs~ masculine idea of what a bedroom should look like.  Not even a week ago I was in line behind a lady returning the most beautiful sheets ever and her reason?.. Her husband refused to sleep on sheets with flowers. As if floral sheets would have some how drained away his testosterone during the night.  This woman was so sad ( they really were beautiful sheets, I would have grabbed them in a second except they were queen not king) and I can bet you any amount of money that her sadness will translate negatively to how much " lovin" that floral-fobic-husband of hers is going to see in that bed of theirs any time too soon! ( how's that for a run-on sentance!) 

 In the end a bedroom should be reflection of the couple who sleeps there with both having as much say as they feel they need to but with neither overshadowing the other if there are strong feelings involved. This obviously is a delicate balancing act for some couples. This room should celebrate your romance!



I am lucky, Doc is a man of superior intellect and a great desire to rock the bed-sheets as often as possible so he knows that how I feel in this room is WAY important to me. He is totally down with his guyhood and a set of floral percales will not change that ( I mean really.. how do you think we got all those kids?) So as I work on our bedroom I suspect that it will come down more on the floral end of the spectrum since such a bedroom makes me feel feminine and sexy which is greatly to his advantage. ( The man is no fool)

On my part I do my best to think of Doc when I am planning and designing so that he has what he needs in our room so that it is  functional for him. This includes easy places to charge his every growing list of computer gadgets, a place for his books, his running gear and anything else that is important to him. Not to mention comfortable places to sit that don't feel too delicate or inaccesiable and yet are lovely and really make the most of our space.

Doc is super busy tonight doing his Doc-work  but I hope he finds some time to comment when things calm down for him a bit work wise!  ( Love you honey!)

I expect this to be one of my longer projects but hope to keep a steady stream of updates going through the project. You can find these updates buy clicking on the ~Romancing the Bedroom~ link at the upper right of the page.

5 comments:

Sherry said...

I LOVE this post Maddie. The thought og testosterone draining floral sheets is still making me giggle. My husband is like yours. He tells me he will sleep on whatever as long as it's with me:) And that ladies and gentlemen is why he gets whatever he wants from me:)Smart man.

Audrey Pettit said...

What a fun post! Loved reading it. You make me smile. :)

Anonymous said...

A man of superior intellect, eh? I don’t know about that, but I did have the good sense to marry you! Hmmm, then again I’m pretty sure you picked me and that, as they say, was that.

What it comes down to is that each person brings talents to a marriage, and the job of the other is to support those talents fully. For us, it’s clearly Maddie who brings the feel for color, pattern, and placement – anything I know about that is only because she’s rubbed off on me. So when it comes to making a space come alive, I’ve learned to trust that, even if I can’t see it now, it will feel perfect when it’s done. When the bedroom is done, it will indeed have flowers and colors and funky fixtures; it will be very feminine, but it will also have the simplicity that makes my Zen heart smile.

And about that testosterone-depleting thing with flowers and prints: here’s the way it works, guys. We all know the saying, “When Momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy,” right? Well, that’s true, and the opposite is also true. What makes Momma happy will come back multiplied, because that’s what Mommas do. What makes her feel loved will come back in greater measure, and what makes her feel sexy … I’ll leave that to you to figure out, but you get the idea.

As I think I’ve said before, this isn’t about being mercenary. It isn’t that I love Maddie only to get love back – truth be told I just can’t help myself. But I can tell you that there is nothing that makes me happier than to see her happy, and nothing that excites me more than to see her excited. I think it works because we both feel that way, and because we cultivate that mutuality – even when we don’t feel it, we’ve learned to do it because it is the lubricant for all those rough edges that otherwise can wear a relationship down.

I can’t wait to see how this project turns out!

The Doc

Maddie Kertay- The Domestic Anarchist said...

Doc... you make me blush! :)

Maddie

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